Beating failure is never easy, but there’s a way around it. You can thrive and conquer all your fears and that includes the fear of failure.”When life throws you lemons, you make lemonade.” This quote altered the course of my childhood, but I never understood what it meant until I was a lot older and had more scars on my heart. If you want to beat failure and become more confident it is important to have a guide. Successful people don’t struggle as much as we do because they understand the keys to beating failure.

I spent years listening to the sage wisdom of gurus, I would wake up at ungodly hours, read their books, follow their websites religiously and nothing changed. I still would shake when I was criticized, I didn’t like change and I spent hours staring into space. I knew what I wanted, but had no idea how to get there, even though I read every book I could find on the subject.

The real deal breaker came a few years later when I realized that I had wandered off the path. I had spent so many years afraid to fail that I didn’t want to take any risk. It is ironic because though there was a battlefield in my mind, many of my peers saw me as brave, but I lacked the confidence to truly go all out.

We have all gone through that because it is easier to envy someone’s life, try to emulate it then actually going for our goals. That way there’s less risk, we fail, but it isn’t as painful as it would have been to actually put 110% into something.

That is the key ingredient, reading books, watching videos on success don’t push you forward. Actually following through is the difference between failing and succeeding and most of us don’t even try. I am not saying that you didn’t try, but how hard did you work at it. It takes time to build anything, every successful person will tell you that. There’s no such thing as an overnight success. If that was the case then everyone would actually wake up successful.

 

Face your failures even if it hurts like hell

When you fail it hurts, it doesn’t matter who you are, it still sucks. There’s this deep-rooted pain that you can’t get rid of. I mean, you put in the effort, the hard work and not to forget the sweat and tears. It will hurt. But that’s life is it not?

Is avoiding failing truly the answer to success? No. Because it becomes a habit that you can’t get rid of and the more you try, the harder it gets to beat it. As a kid, I loved writing stories and one day I gave a girl my story to read. She never gave me back the book and told me she had read better. That was the start of years agonizing over my writing.

After that, I was reluctant to show my work to anyone, but as a result of it, I was afraid I would fail as a writer so for the longest time I never attempted it.

You have to face your failure because if you do fail at least you are one step closer to your dreams. It is better to fail and to grow as a result of it than to never try. If you don’t try you never know where life can take you. Facing failure is the best to beating failure. It sounds too simple to be true. Once you face your fears, you start becoming more confident in who you are and what you are doing. 

Also Read: Why You Shouldn’t Let Your Past Define You

Your burning desire will push you

Human beings are passionate, it is ingrained in us. We all have things we want to do and achieve, places we want to see. Once you rely on that feeling rather

than fear of failure you will move forward in your life.

That burning desire won’t let you down as long as you are truthful in what you want. There’s a big difference in wanting to drive an expensive car and wanting to have enough money to buy the car of your dreams. The first one won’t take you far unless you win the lottery and the latter is a dream. It is a goal that can be achieved.

When you focus on what you want that gives you a purpose. It becomes part of your why, the reason you live. Most successful people when they were starting out wanted financial freedom. To have enough money to do the things they wanted. They focused on what they truly wanted and worked at it. Your burning desire will give you the courage you need in beating failure.

Keep the bigger picture in mind

We are not here for ourselves. I learned that a few years ago, successful people give back. They understand the concept of that. When you think about yourself, your goals and ambitions it can mess up with your perspective.

However, when you keep a bigger picture in mind then you will succeed. The story behind Pencils of Promise is captivating and inspiring. A young Adam Braun was traveling the world on a ship, when the ship landed in India. It was here that he met a small boy who was asking him for a pencil. It sounded so simple to him and hit home, Adam realized that he had been given opportunities that this boy would never know. That is when everything changed for him.

When your purpose is backed up by a more powerful idea, you will be focused and determined to push past the negative Nancy’s or the fear of failure. When you shift your focus to helping others your drive will be stronger. Keeping the bigger picture also makes it easier to beat failure, we aren’t relying on trivial goals that don’t fill us with happiness. Rather keeping the bigger in mind gives us a stronger purpose.

Run the race and forget who you are competing against

Stop comparing yourself to others. Comparing yourself does nothing, but steal your joy and rob you of your potential. Our journey is not going to look the same, that’s the ultimate truth and all we get from comparison is feeling like crap.

It’s not entirely our fault. Society enjoys comparing people. It’s everywhere, we learn from a young age that comparing yourself is a motivator. But you don’t have to buy into it. Just because someone tells you to do something doesn’t mean you actually have to comply. It is hard to beat failure when no one is telling us that comparison is the root of the problem.

Even if you believe that comparing yourself is a way of life, you are not benefiting from it. Every person is different therefore you can’t compare them. It isn’t as if you are comparing two software programs that have almost the same functions or website design.

Also Read: 7 Ways to Stop Comparing Yourself To Others

Struggling and suffering are not the same thing

The reason why we are not confident is due to our mentality. We equate struggling and suffering as one and the same, but they are not. When you struggle, you are chasing after your goals and this leads to success.

When you are suffering, it is a constant battle that you have to deal with and often you lose focus. When you lose focus your goals remain unfulfilled. You can’t beat failure if you lose focus on what you are aiming for in the first place.

Don’t let your failures define you. Struggling is part of the process, the most important thing is what you learn through it. Once you understand that all your past failures have been molding you into becoming a better version of yourself you will become more confident in your goals.

Has your failing stopped you from pursuing your dreams, if so, comment below and if not how did you overcome it. I would love to read your comments.

                                                                          Keep Pushing

                                                            Vanessa