5 Ways To Deal With Uncertainty

by vanessa | Apr 30, 2020 | motivation, personal development

5 WAYS TO DEAL WITH UNCERTAINTY

Find out what are the best ways to deal with uncertainty

Many of us struggle when it comes to dealing with uncertainty. We are so used to living life as it comes, but what happens if everything is uncertain. What happens when the future is unknown and all that you thought you know is thrown out of the window? That is a question many of us have to ask because of the pandemic.

All the things we took for granted is gone. One thing we took for granted was certainty. Now, we are left to wonder what the future will be like. Many people are losing their jobs the world over, and are finding themselves in an uncomfortable position. They are asking themselves what will the future be like? Asking questions is a healthy way of coping, but what happens when the answers aren’t as clear cut as you would want them to be? What happens when you don’t have the answers to the problems?

A lot of people are finding themselves in this position. They are realizing for the first time they don’t have the answers, they wished they had. It is a terrifying time, but that doesn’t mean fear should push you to the back. There’s a way you can deal with the uncertainty that will push you forward and not hold you captive. The problem with fear is it tends to make us terrified of our own shadows. When you are living in fear, you make the wrong decisions. Right now, it might seem as if it is the best choice, but when all this is over you will realize you were wrong. For you to move forward then you should make decisions that will propel you forward. That is what this blog post is about. It will show you how to deal with uncertainty. Yes, things are changing, but you can use that to your advantage, and here’s how you can do that.

Focus on the positives

Have you ever noticed that when you focus on the negatives it is highlighted? Focusing on the positives is the best way to deal with uncertainty. In my last year of university, I had arrived at school a week late. I had believed that there wouldn’t be a lot of work I needed to catch up on.

The truth slapped me as soon as I was given a pile of homework I needed to do. I had two choices to focus on hard it would be to catch up or find a solution. I was so overwhelmed, but I knew that it could be done and I focused on the positives. I had spent a whole year at home. My parents were trying to raise money so that I could finish my last year. That year I lived with uncertainty and had to find a way to deal with uncertainty. Focusing on the positives of being in university was what kept me sane. Sure, I could have focused on the fact I had to catch up with so much work or be grateful.

That’s the thing with focusing on the positives, you have to be grateful. Yes, a lot is going on in the world, but you are alive. Maybe, you lost someone close to you, and that hurts like hell. But there’s so much to be grateful for. Be grateful that you are alive and there’s a reason for that. Maybe, you lost your job, but it could be much worse. You could be in a hospital, contemplating your life. There’s so much we can be grateful for and at times we focus on the negatives. There are so many negatives right now, but the more you think about it, fear will grip you.

Embrace the uncomfortable

No one enjoys uncomfortable situations. It is normal for you to run from that, but here’s the good news. The uncomfortable gets easier to deal with once you embrace it. This is one way to deal with uncertainty. You have to embrace the uncomfortable. Right now you might be going through an uncomfortable situation in your life.

You could try to avoid it or you could embrace it. Once you embrace it. Everything becomes a lot easier and then you can find a way to pivot. Going forward in 2020, you are going to have to pivot. You will have to look at life with a different perspective and the same applies when you embrace the uncomfortable.

Even though, you might have dealt with the uncomfortable before it was less dramatic than it is now. What I mean is often uncomfortable situations were temporary. For example, if you were speaking to a crowd of people that would last at least an hour. Whenever you wake up and realize that your new reality is different from what you imagined it to be. If you want to move forward then you need to embrace the uncomfortable.

Pivot

A lot of successful entrepreneurs are talking about pivoting. What this means is you should take on a new perspective. This is one of the best ways to deal with uncertainty especially now. If you want to move forward this year, take on a new perspective. Things have changed. You can’t have the same perspective as you did in the last two years.

Here’s an example, event companies have lost so much money because of what has happened. Those who will survive are the ones who pivot. A couple of businesses and entrepreneurs have decided to take their events virtual. Artists have used this time to do virtual concerts. We are living in unprecedented times, but that doesn’t mean we should remain in the past. To move forward you need to view something with a different lens. Focus on what you can do now instead of living in the past. As terrifying as that is, it is the best way to move forward. Pivoting will push you forward and you will have a new perspective on life.

Speak with someone

If you are living in fear and consumed by what might happen in the future, you aren’t alone. One of the ways you can deal with uncertainty is to talk to someone. This is the time when your relationships should be evolving. But if you don’t talk to someone, your fears will be heightened. Often, our minds can play tricks on us.

That is because we discussing what we are going through. Loneliness can be the one thing to push us back. It can bury us underneath our fears, but that is because we believe we have to deal with our pain alone. Even though, we are isolated it doesn’t mean we can shut our emotions off. Talking to someone can ease your stress. You aren’t an island and it is scientific that when we are closed off, we lose track of time. There’s a lot of scientific research backing the need for human connection. One of the things you should consider is if you want to deal with uncertainty you won’t be able to do it alone.

We all go through similar stages and right now, we all going through this. Why not discuss what you are going through? Why not talk about the fear of the future? Before you know it you will be better for it and so will the person you confide with.

Shed light on the problem or situation

The last way you can deal with uncertainty is by shedding light on the problem or the situation. It is often said that when you understand something better than you can deal with fear better. The same can be said here. If you are traveling to a new country, research all you can about it.

Once you do that, you are less fearful about what you come across. This will help ease the stress and pressure you might be going through. There are a lot of things out of our control. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t be cautious. When you are cautious the problem isn’t as threatening as you might believe it is. For example, if you are traveling to a dangerous country, there are so many precautions you can take. For one, you never travel alone and two, you don’t take a lot of money with you. But, you can also research all the things you should or shouldn’t do while in the country.

Shedding light on the problem or situation will help you to be less fearful. You will also be able to confront the problem head-on and you will take comfort that you can’t solve everything.

What is your main takeaway from the post? Comment below

KEEP PUSHING

VANESSA

10 Ways You Can Improve Your Life In Less Than 30 Minutes

by vanessa | Apr 15, 2020 | Entrepreneurs, personal development

10 ways you can improve your life in less than 30 minutes

These are 10 ways you can improve your life in less than 30 minutes.

Many of us crave for change because we understand how important it is. Though, the problem is often we don’t have enough time for us to be as productive as we would want to be. You can improve your life in less than 30 minutes. The key here is knowing how to do that.

In this blog post, I list ten ways you can improve your life in less than 30 minutes. When I say that this will change your life, you will be shocked at how that will do it, but it does work. The great thing about these techniques is how many entrepreneurs use them to change their lives. Going forward if you want your life to change for the better than you need to be willing to work at it even if it is for 30 minutes a day. My suggestion is if you want to improve your life invest in one of the ten ways for at least twenty one days before moving onto the next step.

The reason for this is you don’t want to hurry the process so you must focus on one way before moving onto the next one. As much as you might want to speed up the process, the beauty is in the journey and that is why you should take time moving through the list. In less than three months, your life would have drastically changed that you will be shocked that it didn’t take years for you to change your life. It took months. Starting is always the hardest, but with it, you learn so many things that you will be shocked that was even possible.

Work on your morning routine

Want to be successful than you must work on your morning routine. As weird as it sounds, working on a consistent morning routine will push you ahead of the curb. You will achieve more if you have a consistent morning routine. What I mean by a morning routine is that it must be purposeful. For example, there are a lot of successful people who wake up and start writing then they jog, write down their daily activities and have a protein breakfast.

The above is an example of a morning routine. If you want to improve your life then you should have a morning routine. One that helps you focus and work on your goals. Look at your morning routine and ask yourself is it helping you progress or is it slowing you down. Once you figure that figure out what your goals are. If you want more time for exercise, put that as your morning routine. If you want to learn an instrument, add that to your morning routine.

This is one way you can improve your life and it isn’t as hard as it seems to be. All it requires is dedication. Once you do that, you can work towards improving your life. Bit by bit, you will move in the direction that you desire.

Choose an energizing hobby

Science promotes hobbies and yet many of us don’t do them. Maybe, because we think that people who have hobbies have nothing better to do. That isn’t true at all. Hobbies can improve your life. Anything from painting to playing an instrument to doing exercise can be seen as a hobby.

Hobbies help you focus, it elevates stress and pressure. More than anything it increases creativity that’s why many scientists and psychologists speak favorably when it comes to hobbies. I suggest you pick one hobby that you know will impact your life. If you are a sporty person then your hobby needs to relate. You can’t pick something like painting because that elevates your stress. You need to pick something that you know will help you. When you do this it will help you distress and relax you.

Watch a Ted talk

If you have never watched a Ted talk you are missing out. This is one of the best ways you can improve your day in less than 30 minutes. It also works like a charm. Ted talks can make you think about things or situations you might never have thought about. It makes you question your purpose and how you can improve your life.

Ted talks are worth gold because they offer nuggets of truth that can set you free. Free from the mental chains of your mind. I am not saying that a Ted talk will miraculously cure of television addiction, but it can help you think and become more self-aware. There’s power in that. When I first watched a Ted Talk, I was moved by the discussion. It was on how to find your why. That was one of the best Ted talks I ever watched.

It did change my life and helped move the needle moved. I became more focused on what I wanted to achieve and where I wanted to go in life. I wouldn’t have started a blog and written a book if I hadn’t watched that Ted talk.

Also Related: Top Six Ted Talks To Inspire Millennials

Listen to a podcast

Podcasts can improve your life. They offer you daily insights that you can use to improve your life. The great thing is that there are hundreds of podcasts talking about different subjects. If you have never been a podcast person, I do recommend you try looking for one podcast that you can listen to.

Podcasts have become increasingly popular in the last couple of years that you can even find ones that match your personality. Podcasts have a way of relaxing your mind and the really good ones help you to think. If you want to build a business than there’s a podcast for that. If you want to make money online there’s a podcast for that. If you want to be inspired then there’s a podcast for that.

Do a few productive tasks

One of the best ways to improve your life is to do a few productive tasks throughout the day. This will help you to focus and keep you going forward. It is important to set aside 30 minutes a day to do tasks or chores that make you cringe. For example, reply to an email that you have been postponing for days.

Doing this will stop you from multitasking later on or worrying about it. Sometimes the best thing to do is to set aside time to achieve the objective. Doing it when you are not supposed to will only stress you out and that isn’t what you want to do. This is one of the many ways you can improve your life in less than 30 minutes a day. Try it out and you will notice the significant changes.

Get to know yourself better

When I was twenty-one I experienced something traumatic. At the time I didn’t know myself better so I sat behind my oak desk and my old laptop. I tapped the table and made a decision that changed the course of everything I started finding out who I was. I looked up every personality test I could. This is one of the best ways you can improve your life.

It is also one of the fastest ways to figure out who you are. Once you can easily identify your strengths and weaknesses this helps push you out of your comfort zone. There are a lot of sites out there that do offer free personality tests. If you want to know yourself better than you should check them out.

Also Related: Free Personality Test

Achieve mindfulness

Yes, I get it where you ever people are talking about meditation and mindfulness. It can get old real quick and you are tired of hearing about it from your crazed neighbor and co-workers. Mindfulness and meditation are different though. You don’t need to spend years working on mindfulness or a yoga mat.

The effect is the same though. Mindfulness is being aware of your thoughts. The process starts the same, you inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth. You also start thinking about positive things early in the morning.

Revisit your goals

Do you remember those goals you wrote months and years ago? This is one of the ways you can improve your life because you start to reflect on life. You look at all the things you wanted to do, but never go to do it. Maybe, you wanted to start a YouTube channel or write a book. Revisiting your goals can be painful, but it also gives you insight on whether you have done something.

Often life gets hectic and we put aside our goals. Revisiting them and seeing our handwriting is a slap in the face. It pushes us to realize that wait, a minute I haven’t done A, B or D. If you want to improve your life then you should revisit your goals and you can do it in less than 30 minutes. Unless you have a whole journal of goals you haven’t completed, but I highly doubt that.

You will also find out when you revisit your goals they were things you did that you didn’t notice. This will give you a boost of motivation.

Read a book

I get it a lot of us aren’t readers and I am not saying you should become one. However, this will improve your life rapidly. You don’t need a lot of time. Set aside, fifteen to thirty minutes a day and you will be shocked how much progress you will make. If you do this for a month, you would have read one book. If you continue to do this for twelve months, you would have read twelve books.

Imagine how different your life will be in one year or two. How much progress you would have made? Many successful people read books and because of that to set their mind right. That is why you need to read a book, this will help set your mind right. It will motivate you and help you overcome barriers. Feed your mind the right things and you will be surprised and what you achieve.

Be kind to yourself

Most people forget this in improving their life. However, if you want to improve your life then you need to be kind to yourself. This looks different depending on who you are. If you are harsh on yourself, pat yourself on the back for achieving certain things. Don’t forget to cherish the people in your life and appreciate the moments. You will regret if they are gone too soon.

Once you have completed a milestone, celebrate. We sometimes forget to appreciate the milestones and achievements we have made, we should celebrate. Life is too short not to enjoy the little things. So, even if you all you did was go to the gym, then that’s a cause for celebration. You could simply post it on Facebook or Instagram. You don’t have to go all out with your celebrations.

What is your main takeaway from this and how will you improve your life. Please comment below.

Keep Pushing

Vanessa

How To Be Productive At Home During Uncertain Times

by vanessa | Apr 1, 2020 | Blog, Entrepreneurs, motivation, personal development

HOW TO BE PRODUCTIVE AT HOME DURING UNCERTAIN TIMES

The easiest way to become productive is by using a routine to help you out.

.As more people are staying at home it has become harder to be productive at home. These are uncertain times over the world. More people are losing their jobs and it is hard to start something or to be productive at home.

Fear has a way of making us emotionally unprepared for the next steps we should take. The thing is even though everything is uncertain life goes on and if you have to do your job here’s how you can be productive at home. If you want to start something then you also need to learn how to be productive at home.

I have been working at home for over a year now and I have learned what helps in becoming productive. That is why I want to list all the ways you can be productive at home.

Yes, quarantine might have pushed you back, but it doesn’t have to remain like that. You can be productive at home. The excess time you have makes it easier for you to start your own business, work on your projects or even work on assignments you left hanging.

I do understand how all of this can mentally weigh you down. In the last few weeks, things have gotten so out of hand and it feels as if you have no control over what happens. Yes, you might not have any control, but you can look at this time as an opening. You can develop a new skill set, work on your dreams, become more productive or take this time to reflect.

I wrote this blog post to help you in these difficult times that we are going through.

Your Reason

As a kid, you had a reason for everything you did and you made it known. You stole from the cookie jar because you had the munchies. You didn’t sleep in your bed because you had a nightmare. You worked hard on that speech so your parents and friends could be proud of you.

This is no different. Why do you want to be productive? I know it sounds stupid because you wouldn’t be reading this blog post if you didn’t have a reason. You want to be productive at home because it is difficult to do.

When you have so much time on your hands, you can do anything and you have all these big ideas of what you will do. At the end of the day, you then realize you did none of them. Absolutely zero. Not because you are lazy or anything like that, but because you got distracted.

There are fewer distractions in an office setting. Another thing that could have happened is you procrastinated.

It is important to know why you are doing something because it makes all this less hard. It is easier to endure the long day and the isolation when you have a big reason why you are doing something. It could be that you want to make more money in the long run with a side-hustle or you want to develop a new skill. Whatever it is, remind yourself daily. This is a motivation booster.

Use tools to help

There are dozens of tools out there that help with productivity. Find the one that works for you and use that to help you be productive at home. These tools were created to help people manage their time better and that is the issue. Most people struggle to manage their time wisely. I was the same way when I started.

It used to take me forever to get something done. For example, writing a blog post would take me hours to do because I wasn’t doing it the right way. I didn’t plan and prepare before I wrote the blog post so my thoughts were everywhere. When I mastered that it became easier to write a blog post.

The tools you end up using depend on you. You could use slack or other time management tools to help you get the work done. What counts here is using something to help you out. Bear and Evernote will help you jot down notes that speed up the writing process. Todolist helps with writing a clear concise to-do list to get you through the day.

You don’t need to figure everything out all at once. Take your time to figure out what works best for you. What works for person A might not work for you and that’s alright. Our brains all work differently and embrace that, don’t try to do something that might not work for you. This is where research helps. Research tools and test them out to see which one suits your personality.

Write down your goals the night before

If you want to be productive at home you need to write down your goals the night before. This makes it easier to jump in and start working on your goals. Unfortunately, many of us don’t do this and the problem is that often it leads us to not doing what we planned on doing in the first place.

The day runs away from us and we forget all the things we needed to do. It is so much easier knowing what you need to do at work because you already know if you don’t do something you can lose your job. At home, we have no one telling us what we should do and that is why we are less productive at home.

There’s no urgency and it is scientific that human beings respond better to urgency. This is why when you write something down it sends signals to your brain telling you that you need to complete the tasks because they are important. When you are first doing this start with three tasks. It is important you get everything done that you list down. If you add too many things you won’t complete it in time.

You set the precedent so that is why you need build this skill up by starting small. Complete those three tasks and you will shocked by the amount of progress you make. And if you finish the tasks you can start something else or learn something.

Write down your goals the night before

If you want to be productive at home you need to write down your goals the night before. This makes it easier to jump in and start working on your goals. Unfortunately, many of us don’t do this and the problem is that often it leads us to not doing what we planned on doing in the first place.

The day runs away from us and we forget all the things we needed to do. It is so much easier knowing what you need to do at work because you already know if you don’t do something you can lose your job. At home, we have no one telling us what we should do and that is why we are less productive at home.

There’s no urgency and it is scientific that human beings respond better to urgency. This is why when you write something down it sends signals to your brain telling you that you need to complete the tasks because they are important. When you are first doing this start with three tasks. You must get everything done that you list down. If you add too many things you won’t complete it in time.

You set the precedent so that is why you need to build this skill up by starting small. Complete those three tasks and you will be shocked by the amount of progress you make. And if you finish the tasks you can start something else or learn something.

Strengthen your mindset

If you want to be productive at home then you need to strengthen your mindset. What I mean by this is that it will take time to get a handle on things. It will take time to change course because when you are doing something that isn’t part of your routine it is hard. For example, if you decided that you needed to eat more protein in the morning instead of cereal it doesn’t happen overnight.

It takes time to put everything into practice. This is the same thing. You need your mindset to change so that you can take on the day. What I mean by this is becoming productive at home is a way of life. Your habits need to change and that is a hard thing to do. You need to mentally prepare for everything and take charge.

In the beginning, it won’t be easy but if you believe you can do it then you will. If you don’t believe you can change your mindset then you won’t. This is why it is important to feed your mind things that strengthen it from podcasts to reading self-help books and watching interviews about successful people.

I know it is hard to do this when fear is outside knocking our doors, but don’t allow fear to push you aside. Don’t let fear stomp on you until you surrender to it. Everything before the quarantine was uncertain and yes, this is far worse than what has happened in recent times, but you survived that you must believe you will survive this.

I want you to believe that you were created for a reason and keep reminding yourself of that. Keep feeding your mind positive information and this will help strengthen your mindset. This is one of the best ways to be productive at home. It all starts with how your mindset views the world. If it is based on negative notions then it will be difficult moving forward.

Also Related: Is A Success Mindset Still Key to Success?

Set boundaries

You are doing great. I need you to know that, but so that you don’t burn out or get distracted set healthy boundaries. Tell the people at home how many hours you will be working for and at what time. You must also keep a note of the time, don’t extend yourself. Sure, you can say you will work for five hours straight, but we all human. It is okay to take breaks.

Even successful people don’t work for five hours straight. They take breaks in between so that they don’t burn out. Don’t burn out because that won’t help anyone if you fizzle out trying to be superhuman. Be gentle on yourself. Love yourself. One way you can do that is by not pushing yourself to the point where you start seeing double. Even if doesn’t get that bad, take breaks after every two hours.

Even if they are twenty-minute breaks that can still help you relax your mind. We all need to get better at setting healthy boundaries and the reason why many of us don’t is that we believe we don’t need to. When you first started your job you had to set boundaries in the way you dealt with your co-workers and everyone else. The difference here is you are doing it at home.

If you don’t set healthy boundaries then you won’t be productive at home and this isn’t what you want. You want to be productive at home so you can achieve more in your free time and the way you do that is by knowing your limits.

What strategies do you think will help you be productive at home? Comment below

KEEP PUSHING

VANESSA

Who Says You Can’t You Do Book Review

by vanessa | Mar 19, 2020 | Entrepreneurs, personal development

Who says you can’t, you do book review

Who says you can’t, you do carries a lot of nuggets of truth and that is why I decided to do a book review on it.

I am being honest, this would be the first time I have ever written a book review on this website. The truth though this less of a book review and more of pointing out the value nuggets I have learned from this book. Okay, so yeah, I guess it is like a book review. If you are wondering why I decided to do a book review if I have never done before.

That is a great question? When I was writing my second book, the one thing that popped into my mind continuously was to do with how I wanted to inspire people in this book like Daniel Chidiac. His book helped me overcome hard times and it was almost like a guide for me how possible it was to be a successful author. This book is one of the best I have written because of how raw and honest it is. What it does that most self-help books don’t is it is honest without making you feel as if you are a failure.

Most self-help books hit you so hard that you easily give up. The aggressive tone makes you squirm and question whether the book was even your cup of tea or if it will help you get out of the runt.

“Who Says You Don’t, You Do,” was written way back in 2012. No matter how you spin it, that was ages ago. Though, one thing I can say with confidence is that it is so relatable. Even years down the line, it makes you question everything about your life. What I have learned is that books that can make you question the direction you have taken make it possible to change the way you look at the world. This book is a gem among stones. This is why I decided to do this book review because I hope that this book will help you as much as it has helped me. So here are five things that I learned from this book.

Neuroplasticity

I know what you are thinking or rather I assume. If you were like me I thought this was gibberish and I was so confused. I had no idea how powerful that word was until I was tested and I realized that it affects us more than we like to believe, Here’s a little context, neuroplasticity is all about rewiring your brain.

No, it has nothing to do with magic, but it is all about neuroscience. The reason I wrote this as the first thing in this book review is because of how important it is. In “Who Says, You Can’t You Do,” it goes into detail about the importance of rewiring your brain and who the brainchild was of this concept. Even though I already knew about neuroplasticity, it helped me understand it more. It helped me understand how something like rewiring your brain can change how you see the world and sure you might not want that.

You might think that you don’t need to rewire your brain because you are fine the way you are. I was a negative person for years, but when I started to rewire my brain everything changed. When I focused on what I could do instead of what I couldn’t then it hit, I could change the outcome based on how I saw things.

Most successful people have rewired their brains and that is the reason why even when they fail, they keep going at it. Most of us are too terrified to leap, but when you rewire your brain then you can focus on the positives instead of the negatives. “Who Says You Can’t, You Do,” goes into more detail about how you can achieve success by rewiring your brain.

What you believe, you create

This chapter had to be mentioned this book review because well, I do believe that what you believe, you create. Our beliefs have more power over our lives than we believe. They can shape the way we see people and things. If you believe you will never be successful, that is the reason you will never be successful.

If you were to read a lot of book reviews, a lot of them say I believed this book would be good or bad. When they believed it was good, it met their expectations and when it wasn’t, it fell short. Our minds are powerful enough to create art. Think about that. How can they not be powerful enough to shape the way we see the world.

What we believe, we create and that is why if you want to live a life of freedom, you must first believe. I know how that sounds, but it is so true. Keep reading to find out how to change your life.

The Action Trilogy

As a kid, I loved action movies like most kids. Maybe, it was because it was never boring. There was always something happening. From random people jumping out of airplanes to someone beating a bad guy and winning. In the movie, the hero is always victorious. Often at times, we attribute his physical appearance as the reason why he always wins.

That is true, but his emotional and mental state are aligned. I wanted to mention this in the book review because Daniel Chidiac makes sure that we understand how important it is that our emotional state is strong. He mentions often that the reason why some people are successful is due to this factor. They believe they can win. He also talks about often people never speak highly of themselves because of jinxes. Even if you are not superstitious they must have been a time when you believed that if you spoke positively over your life you would be jinxed.

I was superstitious, so much that I used to walk around looking for three-leaved cloves and trying not to walk under ladders. I blame Cartoon Network. However, when I became an adult I was convinced that if I spoke positively I would attract negative forces and fail. In the book, Daniel Chidiac talks about how because you believe something bad will happen it will.

The action trilogy is important because it encompasses your emotional, physical and mental state. When they have all aligned the chance of success is greater than it isn’t. However, he does point that what makes them align is your mental state. He explains if you believe you can achieve anything you will. It all starts with belief.

The importance of peers

I wanted to mention this in the book review because relationships are important. They make us who we are and our friends are important. There’s an analogy Danial Chidiac uses in the book concerning friendships. “Fish will only grow in proportion to the size of their environment.” This chapter is all to do with the good, the bad and the annoying part of friendships. It depends on how you look at it.

No doubt, that friendships are important, but they can also push you back. The reason why he gave the analogy of the fish is that human beings are the same. We adapt to our environments and the people we surround ourselves with. So, if you hang around people with different opinions than you then you are likely to do your best to appease them so you are validated. We all talk like that. We all want that. It is a natural response except when you have to change your personality or do something criminal to make everyone happy, but you.

This chapter moved because we can all relate to it in one way or the other. One thing to note is that a true friend can act like a fool around you, but who will always be there to support you and lift you. The book goes into more detail about friendship.

Also Related: 13 Habits of Self-Made Millionaires

It’s Not Just Your Life

This has to be one of my favorite chapters that’s why I wanted to mention this in the book review. Daniel Chidiac mentions how we can learn a lot from children and when I read that I realized how true it was. Even though we think that our life experiences have made us wiser, the question is has it? As adults, we make the same mistakes over and over again.

Daniel mentioned that the problem is that a lot of people have to go to reach a low point to wake up. As sad as that is, it is so true. I had to hit rock bottom for me to realize that I had to change my life and if I didn’t I would die young. That was a scary thought, if I had realized this sooner before the low point I wouldn’t have gone through an uphill battle. Children are different if they get burned once then they won’t do it again. Their pain points are more prominent than ours and therefore, they are aware of what not to do.

I believe this chapter is important because many of us are asleep. We don’t realize what we want and we make the same mistakes over and over again. As kids, the one thing that irked us was when adults would say that we would understand when we were older. That’s true, but the problem is that nothing changes if everything remains the same. Clueless children grow up into clueless adults who go into debt because that’s what we’re taught. We aren’t taught about making money in school and therefore, we fail to catch up.

Daniel goes into more detail about the ramifications of thinking that life is all about you, when it is so much more than that.

What I didn’t like?

I wanted to be as fair as possible. “Who Says You Can’t, You Do,” isn’t a perfect book, but show me a perfect book. There’s no such thing. I think its pros outweigh the negatives. It has gotten a lot of praise and changed lives. So to me, that is far more important. It is human nature to find what is wrong. I didn’t find anything wrong with it. The chapters were actionable, the analogies moving and relatable. This book is one of my favorites because it doesn’t sugar coat that the journey to success will be hard, but it all comes down to what you want out of life.

I believe you should give it a try because you would be shocked at how your life will change.

What strategies do you think will help you crush 2020. Let me known in the comments section.

KEEP P USHING

VANESSA

5 Proven Ways to Get Up Once You’re Down And Out

by vanessa | Mar 4, 2020 | motivation, personal development

5 proven ways to get up once you’re down and out

Getting up once you’re down is not the easiest things to do and that’s why these proven ways will help you out.

Confidence is one those elusive qualities we strive our whole lives to get only to be down the rabbit once again. We curse at how we there, on top of a mountain staring down at all those who are below. It’s almost as if life has pushed us far too many times to push back. We’re beaten past recognition and when it’s night the silence fills the void in a way we never anticipated.

So, if that’s the case then why do we try our very best to get a hold of it. Why is confidence the one quality we have to have to get out of bed in the morning or to smile at that woman who always sneers at us. What’s the point of all it, because there’s to be something we’re missing right. Someone who has an answer to the importance of confidence.

Most people won’t ever tell you that to make it in life you have to have confidence. To get out of the house you need confidence. To smile even when you don’t want to you need confidence. Life is brutal, let me repeat it is brutal. The kind of brutality action movies have gotten right, sure no one is beating you to pulp. At least not physically, but that doesn’t mean that you’re still not pushed down time again.

Here is the reality life is about surviving, about being strong despite the stronger. And at the end of the day you have to be have enough self-confidence to not be beaten down. If you don’t, you’ll come up with some illness so you can survive the day. Or a reason or excuse not to do something. I’m camera shy. That’s my excuse for not taking pictures.

The truth is I don’t believe enough in myself to appear on photos. We all have insecurities, but they become a problem when we let them. It pushes us to the ground, we eat dirt so we can hide from the world. The world has enough problems that it doesn’t really think twice about our insecurities. Sometimes our problems are manufactured and we believe because that gives us assurances.

Unfortunately, here comes the real issue when we allow this to build up we never go anywhere in life. We will constantly hide so we protect ourselves from the world and maybe ourselves. And the most important thing that we forget is how far we have come.

Past Successes

When I was in fifth grade to make all the kids feel welcome, we were all give certificates. Many of my classmates were given certificates of excellence in sports, academics and art. My parents were shocked because ten-year-old kids often don’t need certificates. I guess that’s a millennial problem. I digress, I got a certificate for being energetic. I remember how that moment made me feel despondent. Everyone got something of value and I did get that.

At ten I felt like a failure. I know ridiculous, but that moment I wanted to prove everyone wrong. The next year I trained for sports, tried my best to win an award and I got a certificate for track. It was an accomplishment. It was a moment I still remember, my friends cheering me on. My confidence was lifted, the next year I struggled getting into a good high school. It was almost as if the whole world was conspiring against me and I was angry. My confidence wavered for many years. It took time to get over many of insecurities, to rise up and gain confidence in myself.

Once you start doubting, it’s a never end cycle. When that happens, it’s easier to sink into quicksand and not get up. Your past failures don’t determine who you are. When you focus on your past success stories, it will be a lot easier to get up and keep going at it.

Past Failures Don’t Define You

How many times do we think more about our failures than successes? That has been the story of my life for a long time. Dwelling on where I went wrong rather than what I did right. Here’s an interesting truth, when you forget about your failures there’s always someone around the corner to remind you. No one remembers your audacity, your persistence or tenacity. Nor they focus on the negativity.

Unless you refuse to listen to the naysayers you will always live a life less than. You’ll always be too terrified to do anything. And too unsure of yourself to risk something. And that will always be the predominant voice. The one that tells you that you’re worthless, pitiful and not worth a single breath of air. As a kid that was the voice I listened to more, the one that said I couldn’t do anything and I always wrestled with the voice.

I would do things that scared me, but until I believed I could achieve it that’s when my confidence grew. Confidence is like a flower, the more water it gets, the more it grows. No water and it wilts away. Flowers should be protected at all times because with it, the world is normalized.

Failures are there to teach you a lesson. Often we’re too blinded by our pain to realize what the lesson is. I used to have stage fright and every time I got onto the stage my knees shook. No trick in the book worked, I was laughed off stage. Cried after it, but I made a promise I would conquer it. I’ve done almost every act on stage. I was in debate club and we had to do it on stage. I sang on stage, did public speaking. After two years of doing that, I conquered stage fright. Was it easy? Nothing in life is easy and that’s what failure teaches us.

Past failures will never ever define you. They’re as an obstacle, a roadblock and a minor annoyance. That’s it and until you realize this past failures will always define you. Your past failures don’t define you and once you understand this you will be able to get up and focus on the now. You will be able to move forward with your life.

Your Strengths

We live in a society that loves pointing out weaknesses. Often it’s with a snicker or a gleeful look. That oh you do this and that. Sometimes it’s constructive criticism, but most times it’s destructive. It depends on who the person is, are they saying it to build you up or tear you down.

At the end of the day, you are your biggest supporter and if you don’t remind yourself of what you can do no one will. I had to take a year off school because my parents couldn’t find money to send me to school. For one year, I had to watch as people moved forward with their lives. Many graduated from university, others got great jobs and I was at home. I was so despondent, depressed that the thought of getting a job in the meantime never crossed my mind.

In that year I lost myself, who I was and what I wanted to become. I kept thinking of my weaknesses and it’s recent that I have started to think more about my strengths. Life is unpredictable, to remain steady you need to remind yourself of who you are. Keep thinking about your strengths. When you do this, you’ll conquer every obstacle you face. When you use focus on your strengths this will help you to get up and keep moving forward.

Gratitude

This one will sting a bit. We’re so lost in our own world that we never think of what we have or how far we have come. There are people in the world who have more troubled lives. Literally a life were they’re not sure when the next meal will be. It feels good to wallow in self pity, to be down and that’s why a lot of people do it.

When you do that it’s almost as if you’re patting yourself on the back for a job well done. You have opportunities that a lot of people wish for. Taking that for granted is a slap in the face to your parents, God and the people in your life.

We all do it, I do it. That’s why it’s important to remind ourselves of what we have and not we don’t have. You might not have a six figure job, but you have people who love you. You might not have a BMW or Mercedes, but you do have a car. Even if you don’t have a car, you have legs.

I’m not trying to make you feel terrible, but there’s always going to be something we don’t have. When you’re grateful, life gets a whole lot brighter.

Also Related: 5 Habits That Will Change You For The Better

The People You Have in your corner

This is one of the most important things to remember. I’m not going to say anything corny or cheesy, but it’s important to remember you’re never alone. That you have people who will help you if only you ask. And at times we forget this or we are too proud to ask for help.

We believe it makes us look weak or scared. But isn’t that the reality, we’re terrified of something, be it hairy eight-legged creatures that make you jump or drowning in the ocean. We all go through problems. Sometimes in order to rise up your loved ones need to lift you up. Doing life alone is not only lonely, but petrifying.

What steps do you take in order to get your confidence back? Let me known in the comments section.

KEEP P USHING

VANESSA

5 Simple Tricks To Stop Being Lazy!

by vanessa | Feb 5, 2020 | Entrepreneurs, personal development

5 SIMPLE ways TO STOP BEING lazy!

If you want to stop being lazy, then these five simple ways will help you do just that.

There’s something exciting about a new month in a new year. It comes with it a sense of determination to what the next couple of months hold. Unfortunately, you won’t go far if you have the laziness bug and a topic of like this can cause people to become uncomfortable, but as an entrepreneur, I know how important it is to work on your goals and dreams.

I know how important it is to work hard, but do it with efficiency. It wasn’t always like this, I used to be lazy. Many people would say I was a couch potato. I’d watch television for hours and never get bored, now that isn’t something I can do without going crazy. The truth is it was easier to kick the lazy bug than I thought it would be.

If you want this year to be your year then there are a few simple tricks that will help you kick the lazy bug for good so that you can build dreams that you want to build and live life on your own terms.

The older I have gotten, I have come to understand the importance of building dreams so that you can live life on your own terms. In this blog post, I’ll show you 5 simple tricks to help stop being lazy. As I said it is important that you beat laziness because if you never do then you will never live life on your own terms and your life will always remain what it is now.

Have a dream you are willing to fight for

When I was a kid, I knew I wanted to make a difference. I wanted to change the world for the better, but I didn’t know what it was. I remember following my father around and admiring how many people knew who he was. When my father walked into a room people got the sense in who he was and they always came back with stories about how he helped them with their business and family.

At the time, I thought my father was really famous, when I was older I found out he was an entrepreneur. A pioneer in a way, I wanted to be like my father but I was unsure if I wanted to be an entrepreneur. To me, it seemed like far too much work. I found myself lost, unsure with what path I wanted to take.

Then I discovered that entrepreneurship is by the far the most dynamic career you can take on. There are so many things you can do when you become an entrepreneur.

People looked at me and told me that I couldn’t possibly become an entrepreneur. The thing is when you have a dream so strong and powerful, you want to fight for it. You have a hundred reasons why you want to do it and nothing can stop you. When I had this dream, I stopped being lazy. I started walking up early and it wasn’t a struggle. I used to struggle walking up. No longer, did I look forward to watching television early in the morning. Instead, I chose to fight for my dream and that helped me to stop being lazy.

Find the root cause

Until, you understand what is going on behind the scenes you will never stop being lazy. I used to watch television as a form of escapism. When I watched my favorite programs. I didn’t think about what was happening at home or my learning disability. I didn’t even consider the problems I was having. At the time, I didn’t even know I was depressed until someone pointed it out.

When you are alone with your thoughts, the reality is far scarier than you want to admit. You will never change your life if you don’t find out why you are doing what you are doing. For example, there are a lot of people who want to have healthier lifestyles yet they eat until they can’t walk straight or lie on the couch the whole day.

As scary as it is allowing yourself to grieve you must because letting out is better than keeping it bottled up. You will also be closer to finding out what is going on with you. This will help you stop being lazy and move you in the direction that you desire.

Quick fix for procrastination

If you are like most human beings then you might struggle with procrastination. I get that, but have you ever thought about breaking your time up. This will help you stop being lazy. Let me explain, I climbed Table Mountain in 2014 as a person who is terrified of heights,

I wanted to do this. The thought of climbing it was terrifying. I managed to make it to the top because I took my time. I took small steps towards my goals and that helped me. When it comes to procrastination, what stops us from completing a goal is the daunting task. The one that is ahead of us. If you need to stop being lazy then you need to fix procrastination.

Break up tasks that are making you nervous into smaller chunks. If you want for example, to start a business, what is the first step that you need to take. I once listened to this motivational speaker who said sometimes all you need to do become successful is to take the step in front of you. If you keep climbing up then eventually you will reach your goal.

This will help you to stop being lazy because you are dealing with what was holding you back. When you face what is holding up, you can stop being lazy.

Also Related: 7 Simple Ways to Stop Procrastinating

Laziness is a state of mind

This might make you roll your eyes and question my sanity, but think about it. None of us are born lazy. No teacher writes in a report card, your kid is too lazy. If you played hide and seek then you are not a lazy person. Circumstances made you lazy and when you are out of school it is so easy to become lazy.

That is why I say laziness is a state of mind. When you are dealing with hardship and struggling to cope, your default setting will be laziness. You will want to curl up in your blanket because it is easier to do that then face the world. You will want to hide because if you do that you can forget all the things you have to deal with.

Our mind affects us in more ways than we think. If you want to be successful then you need to change the state of your mind. If you want to stop being lazy then you need to stop identifying yourself as a lazy person. Once, you do that it will so much easier to actually work on your goal. You want be stuck with a negative mindset. This is by far one of the best ways to stop being lazy.

Also Related: 5 Habits That Will Change Your Life For The Better

Community and support

This is the last thing you should focus on if you want to stop being lazy. Having a community behind you or the support you need will motivate you. For most people, knowing that they had people to support them gave them enough confidence to change their life. Your community can be anything from your close friend to family members, the church, your neighbors or even Facebook groups.

The whole point is find people who are willing to keep you accountable. If you do that, then you can focus on changing your life. This last tip will stop you from being lazy and you can also achieve more if you have people who have your back.

What positive habits have you started doing to improving your life? Comment below

KEEP PUSHING

VANESSA